Old-style comedians are Brits’ all-time favourite

London, March 31 (ANI): Traditional comedians such as Billy Connolly and Victoria Wood have topped a survey of Britain’s all-time favourite comics.

The poll of 1,000 adults by the Ask Jeeves website found that stand-up comedians using abusive language are a big turn-off for many.

People are more fond of Billy Connolly, Victoria Wood, the late Tommy Cooper and Michael McIntyre.

Only one in five adults says today’s comics are as funny as those of the previous generations while 55 percent think modern funnymen use too many abuses to tickle their funny bone.

Several people would still have simple humour such as knock, knock and doctor, doctor jokes.

Billy Connolly, 67, was named as Britain’s all-time favourite comic, followed by Dinnerladies star Victoria Wood, 56, and magician Tommy Cooper, who died during a live TV performance in 1984.

Lee Evans was ranked fifth behind McIntyre.

“From Billy Connolly to Tommy Cooper and knock, knock jokes to why did the chicken cross the road, the old ones still make us laugh,” the Daily Express quoted Ask Jeeves spokeswoman Nadia Kelly, as saying.

She added: “We are constantly surprised by the large numbers of people who go on to Ask Jeeves to search for jokes on certain subjects or to look up punchlines they have forgotten.” (ANI)

Lady Gaga likes to have a cup of tea and a plate of cheese before concert

London, March 31 (ANI): Eccentric pop diva Lady Gaga demands only a cup of tea and a small plate of cheese before a concert.

Gaga likes to have a decaf coffee or a strong cup of tea before she goes to perform on stage.

Her usual requests have healthy products like ‘low-fat milk’, ‘salsa and guacamole dips’, and ‘whole wheat bread’ and ‘crackers’.

The singer’s drinks list is absolutely alcohol free and only includes ‘Dr Pepper’, ‘ginger ale’, 12 bottles of ‘still water’ and a dozen bottles of ‘mineral water’.

The flamboyant diva, 24, needs a jar of honey, demands a tray of assorted meats and a whole roast chicken.

“Despite her out-there image, this rider proves that Lady Gaga is actually quite down-to-earth and normal compared to the diva-like demands of some pop stars,” the Daily Star quoted a music industry source as saying. (ANI)

Spider-Man star James Franco eyes Ph.D.

London, March 31 (ANI): Spider-Man star James Franco has been accepted into prestigious Yale University, where the actor will study for his doctorate.

The actor has already done a filmmaking course from New York University, and also took writing classes at Columbia University, where he earned a masters of fine arts diploma, reports the Daily Express.

A rep has confirmed Franco was accepted into prestigious Yale, in Connecticut.

He will begin courses for his Ph.D. in September (10) if he accepts his place, according to the esteemed institution”s student newspaper The Yale Herald. (ANI)

Kiefer Sutherland’s love for television

London, March 31 (ANI): Kiefer Sutherland has said that he has no plans to return to films now that his hit show ‘24’ is coming to an end.

Sutherland, who portrays anti-terror agent Jack Bauer in the hit thriller, revealed, is keeping his fingers crossed to land another role in TV series, as films no longer inspire him.

“I grew up on films such as ‘One Flew Over The Cuckoo’s Nest’, ‘Urban Cowboy’, ‘Terms Of Endearment ‘and ‘Ordinary People’, but they don’t make those movies anymore. Drama got picked up by television,” the Daily Express quoted him as saying.

“TV is really the home of the drama. When you look at everything from ‘The West Wing’ to ‘The Wire’, ‘ER’ to ‘The Sopranos’, there’s amazing television out there.

“That’s why you’re seeing a huge influx of very successful actors looking at television for work,” he added..

However, the actor will make an exception for a blockbuster version of 24 that is set to start shooting next year. (ANI)

Will.i.am, Cheryl Cole to spend Easter together in L.A?

London, March 31, (ANI): ‘Black eyed peas’ star Will.i.am and Cheryl Cole will reportedly spend Easter together.

Cole was reportedly been invited by Will.i.am to spend Easter with his family in Los Angeles.

“He asked her to fly out to Los Angeles. He’s having a big family get-together and he wants her there,” the Daily Star quoted a source as saying.

Both the singers have the experience of working together earlier and Cheryl is due to share the stage with Black Eyed Peas at a concert to start off the World Cup in Johannesburg in June. (ANI)

Demi Lovato lands role in ‘Grey”s Anatomy’

London, March 31 (ANI): Disney star Demi Lovato will soon be seen in the hit TV show ‘Grey’s Anatomy’.

She is playing the role of a patient who is being treated for possible schizophrenia.

Lovato is currently shooting for her scenes, reports the Daily Star.

She wrote on her Twitter page, ” I”m so thrilled to announce that this week I”m shooting Grey”s Anatomy!!!!!!!!

“AHHH!!!! By the way… Mr. Patrick Dempsey himself wants me to give a shoutout to you guys! Hahahaha so awesome.”. (ANI)

Jesse James” ‘third mistress’ speaks out

London, March 31(ANI): Brigitte Daguerre, the third woman linked to Sandra Bullock’s love-rat husband, Jesse James, has broken her silence.

The photographer and vintage clothing storeowner said she hates the attention she has gained after the exposure of her affair with the TV mechanic.

“I wish it never happened, to be honest… All this attention is what I really don”t like,” the Daily Express quoted her as telling People Magazine.

She added: “I made a mistake in thinking that there was a possibility with Jesse, when there wasn”t. But I didn”t do anything that bad, because, as soon as I felt that something wasn”t right, I stayed home. That is why I get mad when people call me a home wrecker: I had no idea of what the full story was with him.

“I get really upset when I read the headline ”mistress.” I was not his mistress. Jesse was never my boyfriend. There was no love. It was mostly friendship, or at least that is how it started.

“This is just a series of unfortunate events. I don”t have any grudge against Jesse. I have never been angry or p**sed off or anything. I don”t know how I ended up here. I don”t regret his friendship… We weren”t in a quote unquote relationship. I wasn”t in love with him.”

“I only went down to his shop a few times and it didn”t take me long to realise that something didn”t feel right to me and that it was time to stop hanging out with this guy.” (ANI)

Woody Harrelson insists he’s not a sex addict

London, March 31 (ANI): Actor Woody Harrelson has dismissed rumours that he””s a sex addict.

Once the movie star was asked about rumours he was hooked on sex and he responded by stating, “I can””t think of anything better to be addicted to.”

However, he has now admitted that the remark was blown out of proportion.

“It came out that I described myself as a sex addict. That””s not true. I can go through long droughts,” the Daily Express quoted him as saying in a new Hustler interview.

However, Harrelson has also confessed that he has wasted a lot of time chasing women.

“I do sometimes think I probably could have become a scholar in multiple languages and learned various martial arts and acupuncture. I could have written books, given all the time I spent (chasing women),” he said. (ANI)

Pammie dances to Marilyn Monroe’s tune in ‘Dancing With The Stars’

London, March 31(ANI): Pamela Anderson danced to Marilyn Monroe’s track during her performance in the show ‘Dancing With The Stars.’

The hottie did a foxtrot with partner Damian Whitewood in the song, ‘I Wanna Be Loved By You,’ reports the Sun.

Judge Bruno Tonioli said that the “Baywatch’ star radiated “waves of sensuality”.

Pussycat Dolls singer Nicole Scherzinger is also competing in the show. (ANI)

Cher’s daughter files petition to become man officially

London, March 31(ANI): Singer Cher’s daughter, Chastity, who underwent a sex-change surgery, hopes to officially become a man.

The 41-year-old writer and reality TV star requested the judge to change her gender officially in a court petition.

Also, Chastity’s doctor submitted a declaration confirming the sex-change operation.

“On September 23, 2009, I performed an irreversible surgical procedure for the purpose of altering Chaz Bono’s sex characteristics from female to male,” the Daily Express quoted Dr Michael Brownstein as saying in his affidavit.

Now, the next hearing is set for May 6 to formalise the name and sex change and issue of new birth certificate.

Chastity had said last year: “Gender is between your ears, not between your legs. I’ve felt male as far back as I can remember. As a child it was really clear. I felt like a boy.”

“I’ve struggled a lot getting here. If by being public other people can see this and not have to struggle as much as I did, then I’m happy to do that.” (ANI)

No more surgeries for Dame Elizabeth Taylor

London, March 31(ANI): Actress Dame Elizabeth Taylor, who has fought brain tumour, heart failure, skin cancer, osteoporosis, among other problems, does not want to undergo any more operations, it has emerged.

The double Oscar-winner, suffering from crippling neck pain, has apparently told her family and friends that she can’t handle even one more surgery.

“She is adamant she can’t face another operation. Some mornings find her neck in such acute pain she is barely able to lift her head,” the Daily Express quoted a source as saying.

The insider added: “She spends most of the day sitting in a chair with her head on her shoulder. It must be hellish for her but she says she is more sick of seeing the inside of an operating theatre than anything else.”

The ‘Cleopatra’ actress has been facing health problems over the past 25 years.

She has been hospital more than 100 times and twice nearly died on the operating table during surgery on her back. (ANI)

Heather Mills says she treated ex-nanny ‘like a daughter’

London, March 31 (ANI): Heather Mills has slammed her former nanny Sara Trumble for betraying her and dragging her to an employment tribunal, insisting that she treated her “like a daughter”.

Trumble, 26, is claiming undisclosed damages on grounds of discrimination over maternity leave, sex discrimination and unfair dismissal.

However, Mills said the ex-nanny’s allegations were motivated by money.

She even accused Trumble of outright lying.

“Sara won”t look at anyone in the eye because she is lying,” the Telegraph quoted Mills, as saying.

While Trumble admitted she accompanied Mills to Slovenia with her other staff and pals to celebrate her 39th birthday she said the behaviour of the Dancing on Ice star changed after her split with Sir Paul McCartney.

Trumble said: “I wasn”t the only person who felt that at that time. It”s just that nobody else will stand up. I decided to take action and fight this for myself.”

Mills told the panel she asked the former beauty assistant to babysit her daughter after she found Trumble was earning a mere 20pounds a week for giving massages at Hilden Health Club in Tunbridge Wells, Kent.

Mills said: “Overly helpful Heather, I offered her some way to help her better herself as I thought she had huge potential.”

She went on: “I wasn”t demanding and that”s always been my problem… she actually worked the least hours of all my staff, I was the softest on her of all my staff.”

“I do not accept that I discriminated against Sara in any way or that I treated her unfairly. I therefore have drawn the regretful conclusion that Sara has made these allegations against me purely to make money.”

She added: “I am still devastated by her claims and feel that I”ve been deeply betrayed by someone who I considered a dear friend, not just an employee.” (ANI)

Slow mind means more creativity

London, March 31 (ANI): A slow brain can nurture more creative ideas, a new American research has suggested.

Rex Jung at the University of New Mexico in Albuquerque and his team discovered that creativity is associated with low levels of the chemical N-acetylaspartate, found in neurons, and seems to promote neural health and metabolism.

But neurons constitute the brain”s grey matter – the tissue long thought to be linked with thinking power, rather than creativity. Consequently, Jung is now focusing his creativity studies on white matter, which largely comprises the fatty myelin sheaths that wrap around neurons. Less myelin signifies the white matter has a lower “integrity” and transmits information more slowly.

Numerous recent studies have suggested that white matter of high integrity in the cortex, which is linked to higher mental function, means increased intelligence.

However, when Jung analysed the connection between white matter and creativity, he came across something very different.

For the study, Jung selected 72 volunteers and used diffusion tensor imaging, which measures the direction in which water diffuses through white matter – an indication of its integrity.

The subjects” capacity for divergent thinking – a factor in creativity that includes coming up with new ideas – had already been tested.

Jung saw that the most creative people had lower white-matter integrity in a region connecting the prefrontal cortex to a deeper structure called the thalamus, compared with their less creative peers.

Jung believes slower communication between some areas may actually make people more creative.

“This might allow for the linkage of more disparate ideas, more novelty, and more creativity,” New Scientist quoted Jung, as saying.

According to Jung, creativity and intelligence can still go hand in hand. Each appears to be controlled by white matter in a different region. Thus, theoretically, there”s no reason why someone might not have high integrity in the cortex, producing intelligence, but low integrity between the cortex and deeper brain regions, leading to creative thinking.

He said: “They appear to function relatively independently.”

The study has appeared in the open access journal PLoS ONE. (ANI)

Nicolas Sarkozy carries lectern to stand tall during keynote speech!

London, March 31 (ANI): Nicolas Sarkozy has finally found a way to stand tall – the 5ft 5in French President carried a custom-built wooden stand with him as he flew to the US to make a keynote speech.

The lectern was specially designed to make Sarkozy “look authoritative and statesman-like” when he spoke before academics and students at Columbia University, New York.

“The President wanted to make sure that he was completely comfortable when making this important speech, and that was the reason for bringing his own lectern,” the Daily Express quoted a French diplomatic source, as saying.

Sarkozy is notoriously famous for being sensitive about his height.

In 2009 he attracted much media attention when he used a six-inch footstool to stand taller than American President Barack Obama, 6ft2in, and Britain’s Premier Gordon Brown, 5ft11in, during D-Day commemorations in Normandy. (ANI)

Madonna wants daughter to ‘dress more conservatively’

London, March 31 (ANI): Madonna, famous for her outlandish fashion sensibilities, says she wishes her teen daughter Lourdes would “dress more conservatively”.

“You could say it”s in the DNA. I could never tell her how to dress,” the Telegraph quoted Madonna, as telling Us weekly.

The singer, 51 and her girl, 13, have paired up for a teen clothing line, Material Girl, which will hit stores later in the year.

Madonna said: “If anything, I wish she”d dress more conservatively. How”s that for irony?”

Madonna also believes her daughter, nickname Lola, is more stylish than her.

“I am boring, basically. She reminds me of me when I was younger. She just goes for it and tries different things. It doesn”t look like she thought too much about it,” the Telegraph quoted her as saying.

“That is how I used to be, but after years and years of everybody commenting on the way I look and dress and being photographed, one starts to become self-conscious and starts to plan things more. You end up judging yourself more, what looks good and what doesn”t.”

Talking about their new clothing line, Madonna said: “Lola has been bothering me for ages about designing clothes. Stella McCartney is a good friend of mine and she got her mind thinking when Lola was a little girl, about eight years old. She started giving Lola fabrics and inviting her into her showroom and asking her opinion on things, giving her sketch books and stuff like that. Stella always pushed her.

“I have a lot of friends who are clothing designers, whether it is Gaultier or Dolce and Gabbana. Lola has been around all of the shoots I have done and all of the campaigns I have done. She is always hanging out backstage. The last two tours I have done, she has been working in the wardrobe department. On this last tour she dressed all of the dancers.”

She added: “It”s good because she does have good taste in fashion. I respect her taste and I rarely disagree with her.” (ANI)

Brit woman, 66, fined £1K for selling goldfish to teenager

London, March 31 (ANI): A British great grandmother has been slapped with a fine of 1,000 pounds and ordered to wear an electronic tag for trading a goldfish to a teenaged boy.

Council officials caught pet shop owner Joan Higgins, 66, in an undercover sting.

Legal proceedings – costing an estimated 20,000 pounds – against her took eight months following which she was fined and slapped with a curfew.

And now Joan is not allowed to babysit her great grandson at his mother’s home or go to bingo.

Her son Mark, 47, of Sale, Greater Manchester, was asked to pay a fine of 750 pounds and ordered to complete 120 hours of unpaid work.

However, he has criticised the prosecution.

“I think it’s a farce and legal lunacy and I told the council that. What gets me so cross is that they put my mum on a tag. She’s nearly 70, for goodness’ sake,” the Daily Star quoted Mark, as saying.

He added: “Mum has been running the shop for 28 years and this is the first time that anything like this has ever happened.”

Last July the mother and son duo were caught selling goldfish to a 14-year-old boy, who was sent to the shop by Trafford council bosses.

A bill passed in 2005 makes it illegal to sell goldfish to under-16s and offenders can be sent to jail for up to a year.

At a hearing at Trafford Magistrates Joan and Mark pleaded guilty to selling the fish. (ANI)

Simon Cowell ‘to gift fiancée a £65K car on b’day ‘

London, March 31 (ANI): Simon Cowell is set to gift his sweetheart Mezhgan Hussainy a 65,000-pound car on her birthday, it has emerged.

The music mogul, 50, and his fiancée, 36, are believed to have spent an hour looking at luxury models at a LA classic car showroom.

Mezhgan seemed particularly enamoured with a 1954 Jaguar XK convertible.

“Money is clearly no object but he”s considering buying her something that little bit special,” the Mirror quoted an insider, as saying.

The source added: “He”s obviously a big fan of cars but Mish is too.

“But Simon also has a wicked sense of humour and decided to present her with a mirror so they could both check their reflections. It”s a running joke between them.” (ANI)

Men should thank women for creating beer!

London, March 31 (ANI): An academic has claimed that beer would have never come into existence without the entrepreneurial skills of women.

According to a report in The Telegraph, Jane Peyton, an author and historian, said that women created beer and for thousands of years it was only they who were allowed to operate breweries and drink beer.

Peyton said that up until 200 years ago, beer was considered a food and fell into the remit of women’s work.

It was only then that men began drinking it and it became what is considered a very male drink.

Peyton has conducted extensive research into the origins of beer for a new book, and discovered to her surprise that a woman’s touch was found on beer throughout the ages.

Nearly 7,000 years ago in Mesopotamia and Sumeria, so important were their skills that they were the only ones allowed to brew the drink or run any taverns.

In almost all ancient societies, beer was also then considered to be a gift from a goddess, never a male God.

Between the eighth and tenth centuries AD, the Vikings spread terror by rampaging through Europe, fuelled by women-made ale.

Women were the exclusive brewers in Norse society and all equipment by law remained their property.

Ancient Finland also credits the creation of beer to the fairer sex, with three women, a bear’s saliva and wild honey the apparent first ingredients.

In England, ale was traditionally made in the home by women. They were known as brewsters or ale-wives and the sale of the drink provided a valuable income for many households.

It quickly became an essential staple of the diet and even royalty indulged in the tasty beverage.

Queen Elizabeth I, like most people of the era, consumed it for breakfast and at other times of the day.

But, by the start of the late 18th century and the Industrial Revolution, new methods of making beer meant women’s contribution slowly started to decline and be forgotten, until now.

According to Peyton, “I know men will be absolutely stunned to find this out, but they have got women to thank for beer.” (ANI)

Smallest superconductor spells hope for cooler electronics in future

London, March 31 (ANI): A team of scientists has developed a one-molecule-wide wire, which in other words is the smallest superconductor that can conduct electricity without any heat loss, thus spelling hope for cooler electronics in the future.

Heat is produced by wires and components in proportion to their electrical resistance, and that increases at smaller scales.

According to a report in New Scientist, the new wire, developed by Saw-Wai Hla’s group at Ohio University in Athens, is a superconductor, a type of material through which current flows with zero resistance and hence no heat loss.

The scientists made four-molecule-long wires – the smallest superconducting structure yet reported.

The nanoscopic wires were made by placing a mixture of a large organic molecule and a salt of the metal gallium on a super-clean sheet of silver.

The molecules in the mixture then automatically arrange themselves into long strings or wires, with the organic molecules on the outside and the salt in the centre.

The researchers cooled this set-up to 5 kelvin (-268 degree Celsius), and used a scanning tunnelling microscope (STM) to feel for the tiny wires and test their conductive properties.

In isolation, neither the gallium salt nor the organic compound conducted electricity, but Hla and colleagues found evidence that the wires they made from the two together have superconducting characteristics.

An STM works by applying a voltage between the microscope’s tip and the material it is scanning, and then monitoring the change in current.

When Hla’s team varied the voltage and monitored the conductance, a plot of one versus the other showed a V-shaped “conducting gap” that gradually disappeared as the temperature was raised to 15 kelvin – behaviour characteristic of a superconductor.

This superconducting gap was found in nanowires with as few as four salt molecules, but not in nanowires that were only three molecules long.

“Finding out why will help explain how such tiny structures can perform as superconductors,” Hla said. (ANI)

K-Fed says divorce from Britney made him fat

London, March 31 (ANI): Kevin Federline blames his divorce from pop star Britney Spears as the reason behind his weight gain.

The former dancer, who recently appeared on Celebrity FIT club in the US, says the end of his two-year marriage to the singer plunged him into depression, turning him into a couch potato, reports the Sun.

However, Federline admits there may be another reason. He was drinking up to 24 cans of full-sugar fizzy drinks a day.

He told chat show host Bonnie Hunt: “I didn”t drink water, that was all I drank. That was my coffee and my candy.”

K-Fed admits spending days on the couch eating pizza and Macaroni cheese, his only exercise being playing with his young kids.

He added: “I hit 30-years-old, I stop dancing, started eating and sitting on the couch playing with the kids here and there. I got lazier and lazier, and fatter and fatter.” (ANI)